Sunday, January 30, 2011

I'm NO girl scout!

How do I know this...

Well...I don't know much about the girl scouts but I do know they sell cookies and earn patches for their uniforms.

From what I have heard, one of those patches is wilderness survival, including making fire from sticks.

So today, I had many little sticks, match sticks actually, and I had two and a half boxes of them and a pile of about 500 papers...

Can you guess how many matches it took me to burn my paper pile???

Not one, not 10, not even 20...it took ALL 2 1/2 boxes and over an hour...

The things that kept running through my head during my afternoon activity??

1.) When I was a kid I always thought houses with lots of papers would burn faster...humm...maybe I was wrong...maybe paper products aren't as flammable as I had initially thought...

2.) Maybe these papers really are cursed!! (I was burning the papers because someone told me they thought they might be...I figured...better to be safe than sorry, right?)

3.) If I have so much trouble burning papers with matches...I could NEVER survive in the wilderness...where I would probably have to catch my food and then figure out how to cook it...matches or not...It could be a task that is way out of my league...

4.) If I ever committed a crime...I wouldn't pick fire to dispose of the evidence...After all, I would probably still be trying to light the evidence on fire by the time the police came to the scene...(and yes, I admit that I might watch too many investigation/crime TV shows)

Needless to say...I did eventually succeed...the proof of my success?

I have a pile of paper ashes by my back door, I smell like I smoked a few packs of cigarettes, I have more space in my lower desk drawer, I have a lighter conscience and I have a weird sense of accomplishment...for all you girl scouts out there...does this qualify me for a patch?

Just curious!

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